The dried longans, dried red dates and dried persimmons are sweet and will bless the marriage with sweetness.
Pak hup [百合] stands for [百年好合], hundred years of harmony in the marriage. The lotus seeds [莲子] and pomegranate [番石榴/红花] leaves bless the union with fertility.
Chinese also believe that pomegranate leaves have the power to ward off evil. The oranges and red packets are for good fortune.
Bedside lamps
She will then light a pair of bedside lamps. In chinese, lamp [灯 “deng”] has the similar sound as son [丁 “ding”]. So lighting the lamps, [添灯] is symbolic of adding sons [添丁] to the family.
These lamps are not to be turned off until wedding night. If they are batteries operated, it is not necessary to replace the batteries when they run out, even before wedding night.
Immediately after installing the bridal bed or on the wedding day, little children are invited to roll on the bed to bless the couple with fertility. To encourage them to get on the bed, they are allowed to eat the sweet stuff on that plate the good fortune woman has left on the bed.
This is referred to as [压床] ”ya chuang” or [翻床] “fan chuang”.
Remember to give red packets to the good fortune woman and children for their help.
Labels: information, Wedding
Its what inside you, makes you beautiful
Bride’s price 娉金
Some will include the bride’s price with the betrothal gifts whereas some will only present it when the groom fetches the bride on the wedding day.
Return gifts 回礼
In the return gifts, the bride’s parents will
Deliver the chinese dowry 送嫁妆
The chinese dowry may be delivered with the return gifts on the day of betrothal or delivered a few days before the wedding.
Some people have the impression that chinese weddings are expensive affair for the groom’s parents since they have to pay for the betrothal gifts, bride price and wedding banquet.
However, it may not be so, as the bride’s parents also have a long long list of items to prepare for the bride's dowry and may also co-pay for the wedding banquet.
The dowry typically include personal items for the bride and household or electrical appliances for the couple’s new home, such as
Tea set for wedding tea ceremony 茶具
A tea set for the wedding tea ceremony must be included. After the wedding, the tea set is kept and used once again when the bride’s and groom’s daughter serve her parents tea when she gets married.
It is a chinese tradition for daughter-in-law to greet her parents-in-law with tea (敬茶）every morning. However, in modern society, such traditions are no longer followed.
The bride will only serve her parents-in-law tea during the wedding ceremony and perhaps during certain festive events, such as the in-law's birthdays and chinese new year.
Beddings
The bride’s parents will provide a new set of bedsheet for the couple to install the bridal bed(will post on how to install the bridal bed).
The beddings may include a new set of pillows, bolsters, comforter set, blankets, bed sheets, etc. all tied with red ribbons.
Bedroom furniture and bathroom items
In the past, the bride’s parent might provide bedroom furniture such as vanity table, wardrobe, basin stand and washbasin, bath tub, spittoon, etc. Some would give wooden chinese wedding chests instead of wardrobes.
Instead of providing the couple with the bedroom furniture, parents are now giving a sum of money to for the couple to buy their own furniture. These days, the wardrobes or wedding chests are usually replaced with traveling suitcases.
Small item including toiletries such as comb and mirror, toothpaste and toothbrushes, tumblers, perfume and lotions, are also packaged with little red or pink ribbons and delivered to the groom’s home as part of the chinese dowry.
Buckets of off-spring! 子孙桶
A set of baby bathtubs, pails, face washbasin, in red and with chinese wedding designs and the famous chinese spittoon collectively referred to as 子孙桶 is included in the dowry. 子孙桶 is literally "buckets of off-spring"
Why? Because in the past when women gave birth at home, these bathtubs and buckets were necessary items to be used for childbirth.
From a practical aspect, the spittoon was also necessary gift from the bride's parents. The toilets of chinese household were not easily accessible from the bedrooms in the past as they were usually built as out-houses for sanitation purposes. Hence chinese used spittoons for passing urine in the bedrooms at night and clear them in the morning.
Bathrooms are now build in-door in modern chinese housing. Therefore spittoons for the chinese dowry are now usually replaced with cutesy baby potties instead of the adult version.
A Hokkien's special tradition for the 子孙桶
The hokkiens will seal red dates, dried longans, dried lotus seeds, sweets etc into the spittoon/baby potty 子孙桶 with a piece of red paper.
When the dowry is delivered to the groom's side, the red paper and all the sweet goodies inside are removed and distributed to children. A young boy, preferably born in the year of the dragon, will be invited to pass urine into the spittoon. This ritual wishes for a boy child for the couple!
Electrical household appliances
Most modern young chinese prefer to set up their own household when they get married. It became popular for parents to give the bride electrical household appliances as part of her dowry. These may include refrigerator, microwaves, washing machines, televisions, etc.
In the 60s and 70s it was popular to give sewing machines as part of the dowry as sewing was considered a wifely virtue. Many housewives made clothes for their own family and supplemented their husbands' income with tailoring.
However, by the 80s hardly anyone wanted to sew their own clothes when manufactured ones were affordable and easily available. More women became better educated and entered the workforce and shifted their attention to acquiring workplace skills rather than domestic skills.
A simple sewing basket meant only for the occasional patching and mending job is included in the dowry.
This is usually a double joy sewing basket with even numbered rolls of colourful thread, needles, pincushion, scissors, and sewing wax with auspicious words on it.
Gold jewellery
Gold jewellery given by the bride’s parents or owned by the bride is included as part of the bridal dowry. Sometimes these are brought over only on the wedding day itself.
Theoretically, the gold jewellery included as part of the bride’s dowry belongs to the groom’s family and may be apportioned according to the parent-in-law’s wishes. Hence it is common that a “sister” of the bride will make sure the groom’s parents are aware of the riches brought over by the bride.
Chinese prefer pure gold (99.9%) or 916 gold (equivalent to 24K gold). Anything below that, such as 18K gold commonly used in fashionable gold jewellery, is not considered “real” gold to chinese.
Some brides will even get gold jewellery sets known as four items of gold 四点金 as bride dowry from their parents although these are normally given by the groom’s parents to brides as betrothal jewellery.
Labels: information, Wedding
Its what inside you, makes you beautiful